It is currently 4:32 AM.
Instead of working on a report due in few hours, I decided (sur un coup de tête) to create and personalize a blog. (Yes I also like to live dangerously)
The second day of Ramadan just started some moments ago as I heard Fajr prayer call, but it’s that time of the month, so I’m not fasting.
I have no clue why I’m doing this… Well, I could list some reasons such as seeking pleasure in writing, finding inspiration in Marzia’s blog, or even boredom. But all of these aren’t quite enough of a motive to actually create a blog, spend hours on personalizing it, and going on this journey. Especially around a time when I’m super busy with school projects, and exams coming up next week. Truth is I’m very fed up and mentally exhausted of all that, so I just really needed this sort of space or environment to let go of my thoughts and lighten my mind through writing and confessing.
Alternating between eating cereals and typing, I’m thinking. Where is my life going? Not having a quite clear idea about my future is kind of a frightening thought. I’m graduating next year in Data Science field, which I quite enjoy and look forward to work in to be honest , the only issue is that, I don’t want to have a boring life.
The idea itself of spending the rest of my years waking up at 7, going to work and dealing with awful people everyday for a salary I’d spend on bills, is, dreadful to me.
I’m worried I’d be so caught up in work (same as I’m caught up in studies right now) that i will forget to live, to travel, to discover, to read, to be happy.
I truly find amazing how, in the long ever lasting eternity of time, I’ve been assigned this particular lapse of years to live and how, in the vast expanse of land of the universe space, I’ve been brought into this particular place. But I also truly think that it would be a pity to settle for those space and time assignments and let go of any other opportunity to live beyond them. Especially if it’s because of lame everyday commitments, like work.
Although I don’t have much word about the time dimension, settling for the space is not an option to me. I want to see the world as much as possible, push it even further limits. I want to have a piece of the moon, and slide on frozen water on undiscovered planets. I want to go on a road trip through my nervous system network, from a neuron to the tip of my pinky toe.
I want to be able to say someday “F*ck it” and go. Just go. Somewhere. Anywhere. Far far away.
I’ve just noticed it’s already day outside, birds chipping loud and rooster screaming in the far. Many signs for me to wrap it up here.